Monday...a day like any other, although for many it is the start of the work or school week and therefore a day which often has a negative connotation. It can also be a fresh start kind of day as a new week begins. It all depends on your mindset. This can be true of any day. It's a part of life to have good times and bad, but it's the way we handle the situations we are faced with which will define any given day. Let's face it, there are just some days when nothing seems to go right. How can we turn it around and look for a silver lining?  Take a moment for yourself. Even when there seems to be no time and one problem after another, you can always find five minutes to just walk way, call someone you love, text a friend who makes you laugh, step outside for some fresh air or grab a piece of chocolate! Whatever it takes to put a smile on your face for just a few minutes...do it! There can be something positive every day, so don't forget look for it.😊

I could not agree more with every word in the above image, so for this motivation Monday post, I would like to focus on this concept. It can be so easy to give up on something after a very short time if you don't see results quickly or face too many obstacles or challenges along the way. This can apply to many aspects of our lives. We can talk about relationships, careers, hobbies, fitness, sports... and the list goes on. I think the eight points listed above are so accurate and very important to remember as we embark on different journeys in our lives. 

1. Success takes time:  "Rome was not built in a day". I know this can be a tough one for me as I tend to be impatient and want the instant result or gratification which is often impossible to achieve. Once you realize this, I think it is so important to look at each step you take toward a goal as progress. You will most likely need to measure in weeks, months or even years depending on the goal, but it's what you do each day which will add up.

2. Prove yourself right: If you have a dream or a goal that you want to achieve and you feel it's within reach, you need to go for it. Even if you feel it's slightly out of reach, you will never know until you try. If you want to lose twenty pounds, you know you can. It may seen like a daunting task at first, especially if you have tried and failed before, but you know there is no reason you cannot accomplish this goal, So make a plan, stick to it day by day... and prove yourself right!

3. Prove the haters wrong:  This can be one of the sweetest moments of victory depending on the goal and situation. If you receive negative feedback from people regarding things you choose to do or hope to accomplish, you cannot let that stand in your way. If people discourage you, it can often come from a place of jealousy or self-doubt. If you set out to run a marathon and there are those who make you feel like you will never be able to cross that finish line, ask yourself..."what motive could this person possibly have for being negative?" Is it because this person could never have the discipline to do the same thing or maybe tried and failed in the past? Is it because this person is jealous of the level of fitness you have or how you look as a result of it? You may never know what the answer is, but it can be motivating to want to prove this person wrong and perhaps wear that medal around your neck the next time you see him or her!

4. Make yourself happy:  This should be the number one reason not to give up. We have one life, and we need to try and live it to the fullest. Whatever you do in life that makes you happy is so important. If it's a sport or hobby that challenges you but makes you happy, don't ever give up on it.

5. Make your time worth it: Often things in life that mean the most take commitment...and this requires time. Time is our greatest asset, and if you are going to spend time working toward a goal, then please achieve that goal. Time is so precious that it should not be wasted on something you don't care about enough to stay committed to. Make wise choices and stick to them so that you will never feel like you wasted your time.

6. Your friends and family are rooting for you:  Without a doubt, those who care about you are in your corner. Whatever is important to you and makes you happy, they will support.

7. You'll live in regret:  "You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take."  You will never know what you can achieve if you don't try. If there is something you want to accomplish, come up with a plan and stick to it. Even when obstacles arise, try to overcome them and stay the course. If you give up when something goes wrong or is harder than you thought it would be, you will never know if you could have seen it through. You will then be left with uncertainty and regret. Realistically all goals we have may not be attainable, but if you don't give all that you can, you will always wonder what could have been.

8. Think of those you can inspire: Set a goal...do the work...achieve the goal, and now you are a role model. It can be a great feeling to have others say "I don't know how you do it" or "You are so impressive" or "I am inspired by you". You may not realize things you do have an impact on others, but often they do. Whether it's family, friends or acquaintances, people who see you follow through with something and achieve a goal can then be inspired to do the same. So while I truly feel the only person you have to impress is yourself, it can be nice to have your achievements encourage others as well.

March 8...Happy International Women's Day! This is a day to celebrate and recognize all women across the globe and their accomplishments. The scope of what women can do is limitless and this day should be especially motivating and inspirational to working moms everywhere.

This day began in 1911 and recognizes the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women all over the world. It it also intended to be a call to action for gender equality. 

There are so many strong, inspiring women in this world with all kinds of amazing stories. We should always follow our dreams, challenge ourselves, support each other and show our daughters that anything is possible! "Strong women...may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them!💪🏼💗

There can be a fine line between motivating our kids and pushing them when it comes to sports or any activity. I think it's incredibly important to support our kids and encourage their interests. If it's a sport, then I think we need to find the balance between fun and burnout.  Every child who steps on a field, court, balance beam or diving board is not headed for the Olympics. The way some parents act you would think the only reason they have their kids in sports is because they are expecting a gold medal some day. Or if not a medal, perhaps a college scholarship or professional contract. How about just encouraging your child to have fun and enjoy all the benefits sports can offer. Sports can be a challenge, but also a great way to make friends, be a part of a team, move and stay fit, and learn about commitment and dedication. There is nothing wrong with a competitive spirit and wanting your child to succeed, but it's also great to support teamwork and perseverance even when your child is not a super star athlete. If he or she is enjoying the sport, that is truly what matters most. If  your child shows potential to excel, then it's very natural to want him or her to get to a very high level. When you see talent and determination, I think it should be supported as much as possible. However, as an orthopedic surgeon,  when I see 8 and 10 year olds in my office with overuse injuries because they are playing on 3 baseball teams year round, it can be a sign that those parents need to take a step back and consider what is really best for their child.

How can we know if our kids are destined to be a collegiate or professional level athlete? I think talent can be seen at a young age and should be supported, but if there is no element of fun, most likely there will be burnout before full potential is achieved. When you hear professional athletes discuss their journeys, there is often mention of supportive parents who sacrificed things when necessary to make sure they could follow their dream. They may also speak of times when they didn't want to practice, but their parents insisted. At the time, they may have been unhappy, but in the long run they realized it was necessary. There can be motivation and encouragement but there also needs to be understanding. Parents can be instrumental in their kids' success, but if they aren't careful, they can be detrimental to it as well.  There is no substitute for hard work, and both parents and coaches can instill this in young athletes to some degree, but it also has to come from within. Those who achieve great success will always discuss the hours of practice, the passion and the appreciation for those who supported them along the way. 

My younger daughter is a competitive rider. She started taking lessons at a very young age and then stopped for many years. She knew when she got older that she wanted to get back to it. She ultimately became part of a wonderful horse show team with an amazing trainer, and she did her first show at age 14. She rode in a group lesson with other girls who had more experience than she did which was a little intimidating at first. Early on she questioned her ability, but after a short time she realized she was improving and ultimately she "caught up" to the other girls, became friends with them and was very successful at showing. I did my best to encourage and support her and be the best "horse show mom" I could be. This could mean dragging her out of bed at 4:30am on a show morning because when you ride the light gray horse, bathing  her the night before and expecting her to still be clean the next morning is not an option! She didn't love me in that moment, but we got through it many times over and ultimately she was always happy (and nervous) when we arrived at the show grounds with her team and her gorgeous, clean horse! There can be ups and downs at shows like with any sport. There can be fence refusals. falls or rounds you don't place in. But for every down for my daughter, there were 10 times as many ups, and her trainer was always the best at looking for personal victories for her riders even if the ribbons weren't plentiful. 

That was a great lesson for riders and parents alike. That is definitely the philosophy which breeds champions, but more importantly, happy champions. Sure it's nice to win the blue ribbons, and my daughter won her fair share, but it is also nice to improve your skills, have fun and be excited to get back to your next lesson and strive for better. She could do that because she had fun. So I think motivating our kids in sports involves helping them with the discipline needed to be committed, but also making sure there are still smiles and fun. No doubt there will be some tears and disappointment mixed in along the way, and perhaps that's when the motivation matters the most!  Even if you think your daughter is the next Serena Williams, you need to support her and encourage her just as much when she loses the match as when she wins.  And in the event that she then says she wants ski instead, support that too and maybe she will turn into the next Lindsey Vonn. Better still she will be your daughter who participates in whatever sport or other activity makes her happy with a support system cheering her on!👏🏻

Monday....the start of the work week for many of us and often a dreaded day. The weekend seems to go by so fast and now we are back to the grind of the work week. What if we looked at Mondays in a similar way to New Year's Day? What if we took just a fraction of the excitement we often have for the new year and put that toward every Monday? The start of each week can be a new beginning. Maybe we don't need a new beginning every week, but it is certainly a chance to make plans and set goals. What can you accomplish this week? How can you approach it differently than last week? Maybe you already have a good routine and habits which carry you through week after week, but if not, choose something to change and start it on a Monday. Change can be so difficult, but little by little it can happen. Creating habits takes time, but it will never happen if you don't start. Getting through one week can lead to a second and so on. If the "to do" list is long, every Monday can be another opportunity to embark on a new task. 

We discuss the struggles of working moms often on this blog, and hopefully try to give some helpful tools and advice based on our experiences. Monday is not my favorite day of the week, but as the weekend draws to an end, I do try to look at the week ahead and create a plan. I like to write things down and use a planner. It is my prize possession!! I have my plan for the week on paper, and for me, that helps. Monday is an office day for me so I try to be up early, pick out a great outfit and get to work early. I will have 25-30 patients to see, and some days run more smoothly than others. I try to approach the day with a good attitude, and I feel like looking my best is part of that. For many of the early months of the pandemic, I wore scrubs to the office which I would not typically do. As a surgeon, of course I wear scrubs in the operating room, but that is just two days of the week. The other days I am in the office, and as a big fan of clothes and shoes, I enjoy dressing up on those days. The months spent in scrubs all the time were practical and easier, but once I started getting dressed up again, I felt better. I felt more like me and had a renewed enthusiasm for those office days, including Monday. "Look good, feel good!"

Okay, so now we are embracing Monday! It is the start of whatever you want it to be. Get up early, workout, have your coffee or do whatever fuels you in the morning and then get ready...even if you are working from home. Try getting out of the yoga pants, even putting on some make-up and maybe a change of scenery by working from a different room in the house.  Make a plan for the week. Decide what HAS to get done and then what would you LIKE to get done. Write it down. Whatever happens by Friday, be proud. There is no way you won't accomplish at least some of what was on your list. Don't dwell on what didn't happen...remember another Monday is just a couple of days away!

So let's all be go-getters this week! I think it's a mind game sometimes, especially these days. We are all living with varying degrees of limitation and loss. We are trying to make the best of our days despite still being in the midst of the pandemic. It can definitely rattle our motivation sometimes, but there are also many stories out there of people making great changes and remaining positive.  If you are already on a good path, keep it up! If not, see what you can do on this Monday to take a step in the right direction.  You will never know what you can accomplish if you don't try. 💪🏼💗

Through high school and college, I played lacrosse and during high school I also had a horse and competed in shows. I remember thinking I should do one or the other so I could devote myself to that particular sport more completely. However at the time, I loved them both and did not want to give up either one. I was a good rider and a good lacrosse player but not "the best".  I worked hard at both and had fun. I look back now, and I'm very glad I didn't give up one for the other, at least not until college. At that time I gave up riding and focused on lacrosse. I became a better player and was a valued member of my team, but once again not "the best". When you play a team sport, the most important thing should be your contribution to the team, but there are certainly still ways of singling out the best players and giving them special recognition. I was never an all-American or MVP of a tournament, but I was an elected team captain for 2 years which I felt in many ways, meant even more, especially since I missed a whole season due to a knee injury requiring surgery.

Being "the best" or striving to be can be applied to many areas of our lives. We can relate it to academic achievements, career goals, and other roles we play such as parent or even friend. We are constantly evolving, and if we have goals in mind, we are working toward them. At times, it can be difficult to feel motivated especially if you feel what you are working toward is a far reach. I think no matter how lofty the goal, with discipline, anything is possible. But does that mean you have to be the best? It doesn't. You have to be one step closer to achieving what you want. If you want to win the race, the game, the job promotion or 'the "mom of the year award", you may not be satisfied until you have that title. What about completing the race, playing your best, receiving praise from your boss, or getting the biggest hug from your child when you come home from work? These can all be amazing, feel good moments even if you don't feel like you are "the best". If you have given all the effort you can, then you are the best you can be at that time.

Stepping out of your comfort zone with hopes of achieving something you never thought possible can be scary but also very rewarding. If becoming the best at something is what you hope to achieve, it can be a driving force. I think the journey toward that goal is just as, if not more important than the end result. Again, how do we define "the best"?  I think the most important part of the definition should be commitment and discipline. If you wake up every day and take one step closer to living your best life, whatever that means for you, then you are succeeding. The work and time spent will pay off in some way. Taking action and actually doing instead of wishing for things to happen is the key. Most achievements are years in the making, but many of us are often looking for more instant gratification. The work can be hard and take time, but the potential result is well worth it. Not giving up can be the hardest part of becoming "the best", so focus and perseverance are critical. 

I learned this firsthand when I started taking ballroom dance lessons. This was something brand new I decided to learn at age 47.  The challenge was far greater than I expected, but the journey toward success in the pro-am dance world became an incredible part of my life. Competitions come with medals, trophies and titles, so I could look at my first place medals as validation of my efforts, but as my teacher often reminded me, it was more important to look at my improvement. We worked very hard and spent countless hours in the studio to achieve what we did. I freely admit that the gold medals are nice, but when the placement was not as good yet my teacher was happy with how I danced, that was the most important thing. The improvement in this sport is definitely measured in months and years. The day to day practice can bring ups and downs, but the big picture progress that comes from this day to day discipline is what matters. I may never be "the best" student dancer, but working toward that type of goal makes all the hours so worthwhile. 

So what is the take home message here?  The definition of "the best" is not clear. It is so different depending on the scenario. It can be that gold medal or title of "champion", but it can also be the accomplishment of completing all the tasks you had planned for a day. It can be doing a workout or helping your child with a school project. It can be reaching out to a friend who needs you or figuring out how to update the website for your business. It can be not falling off the wagon with the healthy eating plan you are trying to follow. It can be many things. I think my take home point is stay disciplined and consistent about the things that are important to you and anything is possible.  Believing in yourself is the best!🥰

I could not have been more excited to share the above photo on social media the minute I had the first dose of the vaccine. It was given to me as the most amazing Christmas gift on December 24th. I received the second dose this past week and had no issues with it. I am so thankful to now be fully vaccinated. For me, and I think for all of my fellow health care providers, the chance to be in the first group receiving the vaccine felt like a bit of hope during this seemingly hopeless time.  

We are then faced with virus mutations, extended timeframes to vaccinate the population and persistently overwhelmed hospitals. When will this ever end? I think we all ask ourselves that question on a routine basis. It is hard to believe we have been dealing with this for almost a year now, and it's even harder to feel like we are possibly another year or more away from returning to some type of normalcy. 

We had such hope as we celebrated the new year, but of course the first few weeks of 2021 have been no better. I don't think anyone expected some miraculous change as we simply went from Dec 31 to Jan 1, but as we look back on 2020 as one of the worst years in recent history, we look ahead with the feeling that 2021 will have to be better. So how do we hang on to the hope that better days are coming? I wish I had the answer. Some days it seems like there is no end in sight, and it is very easy to dwell on everything we are missing out on. 

Celebrations, stadiums, concerts....and what I wouldn't give for a packed dance floor!  These are all the things that were a big part of my life, and along with travel, all the things I hold out hope to return to. Of course some of these things have happened on a smaller scale, but this life, this "new normal" is something that still feels so foreign. We have to hold on to the belief that this unprecedented time will come to an end, and we will be able to enjoy being social human beings again with the freedom to safely gather and go anywhere we want.

I don't have the answer, and my initial excitement and true joy about receiving the vaccine has definitely diminished due to  the ongoing struggles and record breaking numbers of cases and hospitalizations. If we can just see these numbers trend down globally as the numbers of vaccinated people trend up, I think it will be a chance to have hope. As I approach a big milestone birthday later this year, I remain hopeful that I can have a celebration. I hope there will be a reason to celebrate far more meaningful than just that birthday. I sincerely hope that by May, the pendulum will have swung in the other direction and we will truly be seeing light at the end of what has been a very long tunnel.🤞🏻

As we celebrate Martin Luther King today...let's not lose hope...better days are coming❤️

I am the first to admit that it is nearly impossible to be a working mom without help, but I also believe that your ultimate success at anything you do comes from within. In order to achieve whatever goal you may have, it is important to have the motivation and drive to do whatever it takes. Some days may be easier than others, but the big picture view is what matters. If you have a day that feels like nothing has gone right, you have to force yourself to not give up and look toward tomorrow. If you had plans for a day which you didn't accomplish, you need to remind yourself that you can try again tomorrow. Tomorrow arrives at 12:01 am.

Some consider themselves night owls while others are early birds. I think when you are a busy working mom, you are probably both. When searching for extra time in the day, it may be those late night or early morning hours when everyone else is asleep which are most valuable. While your sleep is also critical, it can be a time when you can dig deep and get things accomplished. During my training as an orthopedic resident, I learned how it is possible to work straight through the night into the next day. I was a lot younger then, but I was also a working mom. I did have help, but I also found that I had to rely on myself the most during those hours. Over the years since, I have occasionally found that I could still be very productive during those hours.  So here I am at 1:00 am, writing this post with plans to then clear off my desk, put laundry away and workout. I have to be up at 5:00 am to get ready to leave for work. which means just a few hours of sleep, but sometimes that can be enough.😴

For some, the idea of only getting a few hours of sleep is not very appealing and may not be a healthy solution even on the busiest of days. If the occasional "all nighter" is not in your armamentarium, then I think careful scheduling and prioritizing is key. There may be days when the list of things to do seems unattainable. On those days, you need to take a step back and figure out what's most important. Hopefully at least a little bit of quality time with the kids will always be possible. If you can have dinner together and then get to those ever pressing emails once the kids go to sleep, I think that will always be the right decision.  The art of time management is just that...an art. It will never be a science for the working mom, and it is an ongoing struggle. Even now as the working mom of young adult kids who are in college, I still find that there are not enough hours in the day sometimes. They don't need me the way they used to, and when they are home they come and go as they please and take care of themselves, so quality time  becomes even more of a priority.  We schedule it and follow through. I have gone through an evolution as a working mom which has involved different strategies regarding time management. In my opinion, the quote below is the best advice one could give a working mom or anyone. Decide what is most important to you on any given day and make it happen, but realize that 12:01 am will arrive again and you will always have the chance to do more.⏰

How many of us can relate? I know the idea of making New Year's resolutions is often very exciting. The new year always seems like a fresh start and a chance to set new goals. This can be in the form of changing bad habits, or trying something brand new. Some have no interest in making resolutions, but I think many feel it is a way to try and be accountable. If you write it down or say it out loud to someone else, then it seems, at least at first, like there is no way you will give up. We often start the new year extremely motivated to... fill in the blank with your resolution of choice. The big question is how long will that motivation last, and do these resolutions stick. Or instead, do we fall off the wagon before we barely get started and regret ever making the resolution in the first place. Then it just becomes a failure, but we carry on thinking...there's always next year. 

Some of the most common resolutions made are those regarding diet and exercise. People often indulge during the holidays and then plan to start the year off on a fitness journey of some type. This is a very admirable plan but so often people are all about it for the first few days or even weeks and then start to stray. I have certainly been guilty of this in the past. I don't have the magic solution, but I can offer this bit of advice (which is not earth shattering) ...seeing results from a change in diet, exercise or both takes time. "Rome was not built in a day." I tend to be the instant gratification type and have failed many times at diets and exercise programs over the years. Three years ago I finally committed to a program that really worked for me, but I also forced myself to be patient. I had let 20 extra pounds creep on during the two years prior, and I was tired of trying to camouflage it.  I finally decided to get the body back I had 20 pounds ago. I found the motivation to stick with it so I could get back into all the clothes that had become too tight and feel like myself again. This revelation did not coordinate with the start of a new year, but I made a resolution of sorts in November of 2017 and after about 5 months I lost the weight, and I have maintained it ever since. It is not always easy to stay motivated, and it is certainly understandable to have cheat days, but this is one type of journey where a little progress each day or better still each week can add up to big results. I think this same mentality can translate into almost anything you want to achieve. 

Another type of resolution people make is often related to work and/or finances. People want to make a change or advance in their career, or maybe go back to school. A resolution might be to cut back on frivolous spending and save more, or it might be to start college funds for the kids. The new year might be a time to start that business you always dreamed of, or take your current endeavor to the next level. This is another situation where seeing the results of making a change will take time. I think that is the underlying theme we will keep coming back to. For many, including myself, it can be tough to wait for things. You have an idea or set a goal and want it to happen tomorrow...better still...yesterday. I think that is often why people give up on New Year's resolutions or perceive them as failures if whatever it was didn't happen right away. Instead we need to think of it as a starting point, and not give up. If you do not see it as a goal, which 99 times out of a 100 will take time, then all you will be left with is regret.

I think the last major category is that of self improvement...the "I want to be a better person" resolution. That may come in many different varieties depending on how people feel they need to change. A working mom may say that she needs to be a better mom and spend more time with her kids. Spending more time with her kids may or may not make her a better mom, but I'm sure it's a common resolution. I think most would feel this type of resolution is the easiest. If you make the plan to be nicer, more forgiving, a better listener, etc...you would have to believe you could change this overnight, I think you can try, but this will also take longer. I think we can change some of our traits and behaviors, but it is a process. Trying to better ourselves is a wonderful plan as a new year starts, but perhaps this should be an evolution which doesn't have to stop and start again with a new year. 

Ultimately making resolutions is a way for us to reflect on our lives, and the beginning of a new year seems like a great time to do this. We measure a lot by the passage of time, especially years. We see milestones come and go with our kids and in our own lives. We look back on the prior year and decide what we want or need to do moving forward to try make things better and live our best life. Clearly after this past year, we are all looking to 2021 to bring change and the return of normalcy. We all had varying degrees of loss and disappointment due to the pandemic, but I think many also found some bright spots with the forced "down time" allowing for quality family time and a bit of rest from the fast paced lives many of us lead. As a big fan of the fast paced life, I am anxious to get back to all the things that have been restricted for almost a year now. So did I make any resolutions?? Actually I did not, but I have many goals in my life which I am already working toward.  I am hopeful, as we all are, that 2021 is a better year for the world. I applaud all who made resolutions, and I encourage you to stick with whatever they might be. "You are what you do, not what you say you'll do." Happy 2021!🎊